Recent Workplace Harassment
So… I need to write yet another harassment complaint, and it’s not because I want to, because that would be like saying I want to be harassed, and, I don’t want to be harassed.
To update, the last complaint I wrote didn’t lead to any kind of resolution because I didn’t report anyone specifically. It doesn’t seem like my vehicle has been tampered with since, and these suspicions could have been wrong to begin with. I haven’t rode my bike since, so no tampering since, however, I’m sure my suspicions for the tampering of my bike are actually correct. The strangest part of this situation is building security saying the surveillance cameras weren’t working, among other vague statements, which seems corrupt and like a cover up. I was told to speak with a supervisor and have a supervisor take me to building security, which seems odd; how would the help of a supervisor make the supposedly uncaptured surveillance footage magically appear? Why would I need a supervisor to take me to building security at all? I was told that even though the complaint couldn’t go any further because it wasn’t against anyone specifically, that it would be documented, at the least, which I’m satisfied with because the tampering hasn’t continued and the supposedly uncaptured surveillance footage is documented.
I would blog more often because there is plenty I could write about, however, I need to focus my time and efforts on studying for an exam. Since I’m being targeted and harassed, more so by supervisors recently, there’s been an effort to sabotage my studying efforts. At the same time, I’ve been at the gym more frequently lately, and there have been efforts to sabotage my fitness efforts as well. So what are the sabotaging efforts? Well, my schedule depends on my assignment, and lately, I have a meeting every morning and afternoon. To interfere with my efforts, supervisors required meetings, but more like check ins, every hour on the hour as a form of punishment for lack of accountability… whatever that means. Supposedly people aren’t doing what they are supposed to and so the group is being punished. This measure definitely seems unreasonable and nonsensical, and an effort to harass me. Initially, I was only attending the first couple of hourly meetings. Then I had a task to complete which definitely seemed like an effort to waste my time, so I stayed around for all hourly meetings for a couple of days until it made no sense for me to stay around for that task, and then I returned to only attending a reasonable amount of meetings. I’m not on the hook for anything and these hourly meetings do seem like an effort to harass me specifically. So how do these hourly meetings interfere with my fitness and study efforts? It causes a delay and an inconvenience. It’s something I can work around, however, like I’ve written before, I am harassed at these meetings, so more meetings means more opportunities for the harassers to harass me, and that’s probably the actual reason for the ridiculous amount of meetings. I’ve been going to these meeting for almost a year, depending on my assignment, and there were far less people in the beginning. I wouldn’t be surprised if people are simply showing up to these meetings to partake in this harassment. I could be wrong, but these meetings really do seem that fake. For example, after writing about the computer science guy, there was a new person at the meetings who looked like the computer science guy, and there are many more examples of people who show up to these meetings as if to be doubles to allude to people I know. So basically, these hourly meetings just gives the harassers more opportunities to harass me.
So, I returned to only showing up to the first couple of meetings after dealing with the task I mentioned, and the next day I was told to speak with a supervisor. I thought it was concerning the task that was now pending, but it wasn’t; it was for not show up to all of the hourly meetings. I explained that I usually leave if I’m being harassed, and I signed out and didn’t return because the hourly meetings in general seem to be an effort to harass. I was told that the hourly meetings are not to harass me and that I’m not being harassed. I basically said, respectfully, that I was essentially being told that I can’t think for myself or make my own observations. To make a long story short, I was written up, which I definitely anticipated. Doesn’t that just seem odd though? I’m getting “in trouble” for something that’s supposed to be a general punishment to the group which isn’t “technically” sourced by me as I’m not on the hook for anything. It’s clear this measure isn’t working, especially since these hourly meetings started over two weeks ago, and the problem somehow still exists. One reason I anticipated being written up is because I need an evaluation, and supervisors are aware that I leave to avoid harassment, so it’s a power trip by them because they want to leverage the evaluation to control me by forcing me to comply to avoid being written up. However, I know this is harassment and I have the right to a work environment free of harassment, especially this kind of harassment as it’s an abuse of power; people in a position of authority using their authority to abuse people. I don’t mind being written up because I know I’m not in the wrong and I get a statement, so I planned on writing about this harassment in that statement.
This isn’t the first time I’ve been written up. Most, if not all, of the write ups have been power trips by supervisors. These write ups specifically don’t factor into your evaluation score. I actually love these write ups. They are a great tool to mediate conflict. However, the conflicts I encounter aren’t really conflicts and have been manipulations and exaggerations. They’ve been a way for supervisors to assert their authority over me. For example, I was written up for not calling a supervisor who told me to call him in text message conversation. Actually, he told me to call a number, and I didn’t know that number was his number so I asked why call that number and he never replied. Since I didn’t do as he instructed, I was written up, even though I tried to reason with him that I never received a reply, which is standard protocol in any conversation. Another example is one morning, it was pouring rain, showering rain, and there was no way I was going to make it to work without being drenched, so I asked to be excused (I think I already blogged about this). They said no. I explained that it was pouring rain, and then they said they’ll send someone to pick me up. Issue resolved, right? Wrong! I was written up because supposedly since I have a raincoat I can walk in the rain, which would make sense if it was light rain… but it was pouring rain! They also issued some kind of punishment which I wasn’t held to because I filed a complaint against them because it was clearly an unreasonable expectation for me to walk to work in pouring rain, so again, a power trip.
This is the fourth time I’ve been written up, and since I get to write a statement, I wrote a statement. I was told that I wasn’t being harassed and I said I beg to differ. I was told if I was being harassed, then why would all these people show up to the meeting… which kind of makes sense. Why would all these people show up to these meetings just to harass me? Or, am I simply harassed at these meetings regardless of who shows up? Not everyone is at every meeting and there are far less people later in the day. I’d hate to think that people were merely showing up to these meetings to partake in the harassment, but it definitely seems that way. These new hourly meetings are excessive and unnecessary, but all I can do at the moment is say that these hourly meetings do seem to be an effort to harass. I figured they can only keep up with these hourly meetings for so long before it’s obvious the reasons for these hourly meetings are obviously unreasonable, or, it’ll get to the point where I will be able to file a harassment complaint, or both.
It’s now on paper that I believe that I’m being harassed. Per the write up, I’m required to attend all hourly meetings. I should also consider that it appears that supervisors are hinting to me that they want me to stay around to socialize, which I wouldn’t mind, but what seem like good intentions actually seem to be a guise to harass… and why hint? This cyberstalking culture is used to turn people against me. I’m already being harassed. For me make an effort to socialize would require me to have some trust in these people, and I simply don’t really trust people who partake in the cyberstalking culture. Why would I? I trusted some supervisors who had me falsely imprisoned, and there was even a second attempt to have me falsely imprisoned, and there’s this constant effort or suggestion for me to leave the military. What’s more, I’m mostly introverted, so even if the intentions were good, it’s unusual for me to socialize, especially nowadays.
So I’ve been going to the hourly meetings and there’s usually harassment with varying intensity, and the cyberstalking is continuous. It’s crazy, but anything I do in my living space or on my devices, or any virtual or physical space for that matter, the cyberstalking culture is aware of, which includes people at work. I don’t even know these people. What’s even more crazy is how well known this cyberstalking is by people on the Internet and on TV.
Anyway, so what led to the harassment complaint is, on Thursday I attended the 12:00 PM meeting and stood on the outer edge of the group. There was a void in the group, so I walked forward to fill that void, and I wasn’t on the outer edge anymore; in hindsight, this seems to have been planned. Then I feel something fall down my back. There was someone behind me, I was standing next to them when I was standing on the outer edge. I also kind of heard some movement behind me as I felt something fall down my back. So I turned around and called this guy a name… I said “asshole.” He made no eye contact, avoided eye contact, and just looked at the floor. So I then said something else, because I was upset. I have no idea who this guy is, I’ve already explained how I’m being harassed in the write up, now some guy is dropping stuff down my back. So I pressed him a bit and I said, “the fucks your problem.” He said nothing, continued to hide his face and look at the floor. I didn’t want him standing behind me anymore, so I returned to where I was standing on the outer edge of the group, next to him where I was before. Odd thing is it didn’t seem like anyone else was looking in our direction to observe what was going on, so I sensed this was planned and a collective effort. Seconds pass and some large guy walks into the room, stands right in front of me to talk to the guy who I scolded at. He approached us, not calmly, and not aggressively, but directly, because it was planned, to some extent; I’m not sure if it was planned for me to return to where I was standing. He asks this person I scolded at “did he?” I’ve mentioned before that one of my high school friends would call me “Diddy” which is a play on “did he?” which is to allude to the child abuse, that of which, everyone was well aware of. It seems like this large guy was trying to intimidate me with his size, all the while I’m upset. My heart rate was elevated and I was feeling the adrenaline because some guy just invaded my personal space in an environment where I’m harassed, as is now already noted on paper and has actually been brought up in discussions at least twice now. This is probably the reason I was vocal about this person harassing me. I was seriously offended. What’s going on here is an extension of the child abuse, it’s the cyberstalking culture. They are trying to harass me and have me tolerate the harassment by silencing me with the child abuse. It was also a clear effort to intimidate me, to make me scared, which is a reaction to my recent vlog where I mentioned the cyberstalking culture was trying to have my cousin intimidate me. Now the cyberstalking culture is still emulating the illegal behavior, for enjoyment, being abusers. Did they plan for me to get upset? Probably. They probably just planned for me to get upset, but not say anything. Then they wanted someone to “check” me I guess, as if I have no right to be upset. So after the meeting, I immediately go to a supervisor to talk about what happened. The supervisors are always very insincere to me, mostly because they are part of the cyberstalking culture, so even though I sensed it was a collective effort, it was too soon for me to be convinced that supervisors were involved in planning this harassment. I’m convinced now that the plan to harass me actually originated from the supervisors. So, I explain to him what happened, and I’m using the harsh language I used to express that I’m upset because of the harassment, that of which I’ve already noted in the write up. He then asked me if the second guy said anything. I said no because he didn’t say anything directly to me. I did hear him say “did he?” but it was indirect, so it’s not like he’s going to say he said what he said; that’s the nature of gaslighting. I tell the supervisor I don’t know what the first guy put down my back, so the supervisor tells me to go see what he put down my back and that he would go talk to the two guys… to “conduct conflict mediation.”
So I make my way to the restroom and as I’m passing the guys who just harassed me, the second guy makes a whimper, as if to tease me, making me even more sure of the efforts to harass. I called them “punks.” So I go to the restroom, untuck my shirt, and I don’t see anything drop. What this person put down my shirt was probably very small, so I didn’t think I was going to be able to find it to begin with. However, simply by the way the situation was playing out, I could tell it was a planned effort to harass, so not finding whatever fell down my back wasn’t going to make me doubtful. The first guy’s lack of response and then this second guy trying to intimidated me with his size and then saying “did he?” are all the observations I needed to be convinced; the second guy wasn’t even there when I scolded at the first guy, so why would he randomly say “did he?” … because it wasn’t random, it was planned. Then the second guy made an obvious whimper sound. Then, after some thinking, I found it strange that the supervisor asked me if the second guy said anything to me, but not the first guy. Probably because I said there was no response from the first guy, but it’s still strange. Why would it matter if the second guy say anything? It’s not like he was there to witness any of the interaction. I never said anything to this second guy, so he’d have no reason to say anything, to me, directly. The supervisor asked this because he planned for the second guy to say “did he?” and figured since it was regarding the child abuse, that I was going to dodge it, avoid talking about it, or to use it to silence and control me. The child abuse and the cyberstalking are things I discuss on the blogs and vlogs, but rarely in person. Since I sensed that this supervisor was trying to silence and control me with the child abuse, I decided that I was going to mention the second guy saying “did he?” and the whimper, even though they were both indirect; the whimper being less indirect. I figured if I mentioned it, I would be exposing and explaining how the abuse I experienced as a child is the same abuse that I endure by the cyberstalking culture, at work. So I approach the supervisor and the two guys who were talking behind closed doors. The supervisor tells me to give them some space. So I say alright, and that I have more information. I make some distance and within seconds the supervisor is approaching me to talk. He asks me about the additional information. I tell him about the second guy making a whimper sound and that the second guy actually did say something, indirectly. I tell him he said “did he?” and that’s an allusion to the abuse I endured as a child and it’s the same abuse I experience there. The supervisor doesn’t reply directly to what I said but tells me to hold on. So he goes back to talking with the two guys, and I eventually walk outside the building and wait. Then a second supervisor talks to me, and I essentially reexplain everything. At first he seemed to be defending the guys who harassed me, and I told him it seemed like he was defending them by helping them deny their behavior. I also tell him that I was more convinced it was a collective effort to harass me and that its terrible that I’m enduring this treatment by an institution that advocates high standards. I was being respectful. He tells me to stay away from them and they will stay away from me. It’s not like I can ask for more, but I’d argue the conflict wasn’t mediated appropriately. It’s clear the supervisors were promoting a hostile work environment and settled on an easy solution to avoid any accountability. The problem itself was never addressed directly. I never got the other people’s side of the story, even if they weren’t going to admit to any of it anyway. I usually see these individuals everyday, and simply saying to keep our distance isn’t practical; it’s not like I ever interacted with these people to begin with. However, now there might be some tension or some uneasiness, which could have been resolved with proper conflict mediation. I mentioned that I was experiencing abuse there, which was an extension of the abuse I endured as a child; you’d think that would be at least addressed to some extent because as that employer in San Francisco told me in a voice message, “that’s a serious accusation.” So now in a situation where something was supposed to be avoided by me, it’s now a situation where something is being avoided by supervisors.
So between then and the next hourly meeting, I take some notes on my phone, noting that it definitely seemed like a collective effort to harass. At the next hourly meeting, the first supervisor I spoke with enters the area very similar to the second harasser, looks at me a bit sternly, and continues to his desk. It seemed as if he was upset of what I noted on my phone. My initial behavior with these supervisors, and people in general, is to always be polite and respectful. So even though I know I wrote somethings that this supervisor might not like, who is this guy to be cyberstaking me to begin with, and then plan for other’s to harass me. So it was clear to me, by this supervisor’s behavior, that my suspicions were accurate to some extent… my understanding in general is better now. By the way, those two harassers weren’t at the 1:00PM meeting.
So I thought about the incident, intermittently, between then and the following morning, and I wasn’t sure if I was going to report it as an official harassment complaint. However, the next morning, peers and supervisors were saying things like “don’t snitch” and “don’t talk” and other stuff. I guess they figured I decided to file a complaint… or you know, they probably figured I’d blog about it too, and that’s probably their main concern. I was actually still undecided about filing a complaint, but I don’t like being bullied into being silent, so that’s when I decided that I was going to file a complaint against the supervisors for promoting a hostile work environment. Since it usually takes me some time to organize my thoughts, I figured I’d write a blog to help me organize and reassess those thoughts.